


Anchor

by CrypticGabriel



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Coming Out, Cunnilingus, Enthusiastic Consent, Explicit Sexual Content, First Time, Gender Dysphoria, M/M, Misgendering, Misunderstandings, Multiple Orgasms, Trans Lance (Voltron), Trans Male Character, Trans Shiro (Voltron), Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, trans author
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-07
Updated: 2019-01-07
Packaged: 2019-10-05 23:35:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17334482
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrypticGabriel/pseuds/CrypticGabriel
Summary: Shiro loved his boyfriend very much, but he'd been keeping an important part of his identity a secret from him for too long. But what he didn't know was that Lance had something to share with him as well, and neither of them had anything to worry about.





	Anchor

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, friends. It's been a while! Hope your holiday season and the days following have been wonderful.
> 
> So, a few things.  
> A healthy coping mechanism of mine is to vent and share my feelings via creative writing. I wrote this while dealing with debilitating dysphoria. I know that this coping mechanism isn't one that some people have, and I understand that others might find it uncomfortable that I'm expressing myself this way. If you do heed to the warnings and ready the story, I just want to let you know that Shiro experiencing gender dysphoria is based off my own experiences while being closeted, and the misgendering occurs twice in one scene towards the middle of the fic.
> 
> Another Disclaimer: Shiro is roughly 6 years on T and 2 years post-top surgery. Lance is roughly 3 years on T.

_One thing Takashi Shirogane wanted more_ than anything in the world was to live in a place where none of the residents knew of his old life or old identity. When he finally achieved that, he was more than thrilled. He’d lived in this college town for over four years now, and he was so content being himself and walking among ordinary strangers without a constant worry that people were calculating in the back of their minds on what was in his pants.

There was one thing that he never took into account when he made this relocation and achieved his lifetime goal. And that one thing was Lance. He was the one saving grace in his life, his rock, and he was also the most wonderful boyfriend in the world. Their relationship was still new, but they’d been friends for a long while after meeting each other when Lance was a freshman and Shiro was a junior. Here was where the problem was put into light: There was only one person in this entire town that knew he was transgender, and that one person was not Lance.

The subject was supposed to be brought up… several times. Shiro wanted to say it in passing or in an in-depth conversation, but he was constantly at war with himself when trying to come up with a good enough explanation. Not that he needed one, anyway, but Lance deserved one. He knew it wouldn’t be right if he never told him; both for himself for the possibility of it going sour, and Lance, who had the right to know before getting into a deep relationship with him. But somehow, no matter how many times Shiro screamed at himself mentally to just spit it out already, he couldn’t.

The last time he tried to, he ended up shoving it deep into his subconscious when Shiro’s week didn’t start out so great. He was given the one reminder that he didn’t have the sex he knew he was meant to have. Fortunately, his shark week cycles were occurring less and less and were getting lighter, but when they did come, it ruined him. He wished he could just stay in his room all week with no one to bother him or notice his debilitating dysphoria, but he was an adult with several jobs that needed him. He couldn’t skip out on life, so much as he’d wanted to.

He was just too scared to come out, truly. He didn’t want to ruin what they had, but he knew it’d have to come up eventually. Shiro only kissed Lance whenever they were together. He never made a move for anything more. Even with cuddling, he wasn’t sure if he wanted to keep his body flush with his, in case Lance would notice his lack of a bulge. On T day and during his shark week, he stayed as far away from Lance as possible, since those were the times where he was the most vulnerable. He hated this habit that he had, but he was too worried about the worst-case scenario if he told him.

Lance was starting to notice, though. When his cycle finally left him alone until next time, Lance sent him a text.

 

**Lance: Babe are you okay? You haven’t been talking to me.**

 

He sighed softly and responded to his message, buttoning up his top after.

 

**Shiro: Yeah sorry. Rough week studying. Gotta make sure I’m prepared for finals.**

**Lance: Right. I get weeks like that too. Will I see you today?**

**Shiro: Yes baby. I can’t wait to see you.**

 

\--

 _Lance sighed sadly and shut off_ the screen on his phone, setting his medicine aside after injecting himself. He looked at himself in the mirror. “Hunk?” he called as he reluctantly stepped out of the room. “Do you think Shiro knows?”

“Why would he?” he frowned while looking up from his work. “I’d never say anything.”

“I dunno, but I feel like I’m making it obvious.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “There’s one week of the month that I don’t talk to him. I think that would be a big indicator.”

“Doesn’t he do the same thing, though?” Hunk offered. “He’ll understand that you’re just studying.”

“I know, but…” Lance started to head out the door. “I’m seeing him tonight. Maybe I should tell him then.”

“Only do it if you’re ready,” he warned.

“Of course.” He slung his bag over his shoulder, giving Hunk an assuring smile before heading out the door and going straight to class.

Regardless of how he felt, he was going to tell him tonight.

\--

 _Shiro went through his classes with_ no real issue. It was when he went to work that he had more of a problem.

Lance and Shiro bonded further with each other after they both started working at the library together. It was an easy way to help with tuition, and Shiro also had a second job to take care of his more daunting studies in grad school.

“So, what’s for dinner tonight?” Lance asked curiously, in hushed tones while they put books back on the shelves.

He gulped and rubbed the back of his neck. “I was just gonna order in, if that’s alright.”

Lance smiled and pushed the cart to the other side of the hall. Shiro followed along easily. “That’s okay with me. I can’t wait to talk with you about my week.”

“Me too…” He trailed off. “Actually, it’s a good time to see you, because there’s something I have to tell you tonight. It’s really important.”

“Oh?” Lance tilted his head but nodded insistently. “Okay. Let’s finish up our shift first. The sooner we get it done, the sooner we can spend time together.”

“Right,” he chuckled, a little too loud for the library’s liking. His affirmation was met with a chorus of “Shhh!” hisses from every corner of the building.

\--

 _He took a deep breath as_ he looked at himself in the mirror. It took him forever to feel presentable. His favorite sweater that gave his hips less of an accent was in the laundry, and he had to improvise. He wore a black button-down, one that helped him live his day-to-day life before his surgery, and it did help him feel a little bit better. He had to keep adjusting his boxers, desperate to impress Lance with his physique but too self-conscious while trying to fix his packer the right way. He must’ve changed his pants several times.

His room was empty, his roommate being a wonderful saving grace and leaving him alone for the night. The food was going to arrive any minute now.

Speaking of, there was a knock on the door. “Be right there!” he called, hurrying up to the door. The delivery guy had his food ready for him, and he gave him his best smile despite his nerves over Lance coming over. “Hi,” he beamed and had his money ready.

The man handed him his food. “Okay. That’s $23.58, ma’am.”

Shiro felt ice stab into his chest and spread throughout his body. Was it his hair? Did his shirt really not do a good job at hiding his hips? His voice was deep, but he did only say one word… He wanted to say something. He so, _so_ desperately wanted to correct him, but he wanted to just let it slide off him. He didn’t want to upset himself. “Ah. Right…” He took a deep breath and handed him the money. “The tip’s in there for you.”

“Thank you,” he smiled. “Enjoy the rest of your evening, miss.”

His heart stopped. “That’s _Sir.”_

He watched his gaze wander to the floor, face turning red. “Oh. I’m sorry.”

“Drive safely,” was all he could come up with before he shut the door. Great. This was all he needed tonight. He set the food down on the table, feeling a vicious wave come down on him. He couldn’t do this. He grabbed his phone, so he could cancel the date.

He went to call him, but the thought of speaking again made him falter. He started to text him instead.

 

**Shiro: Babe, I’m sorry but I’m not feeling very well today. Maybe we should have dinner another time.**

 

Right as he sent it, he heard another knock on the door. Fuck… He could feel tears in his eyes.

“Just a second,” he called, quickly trying to clean up his face with some of the napkins left for them in the back. He answered the door with not that much grace. “Hey, baby.”

Lance was looking at his phone before glancing up. He looked hurt. “You look fine to me.”

He cleared his throat. “Y’know what, you’re already here. Let’s go in.”

It looked like his boyfriend wasn’t very much into their date now. Why did that delivery guy have to ruin everything? He wished he wasn’t so damn sensitive. It was all he could think about while he was eating dinner, not saying a word to Lance.

“…Shiro? Didn’t you want to tell me something?” he heard him offer while he was digging such a deep hole from within.

He frowned. “I don’t think tonight’s a good night.”

“But—” He paused and let out a sigh. “I mean, I have something to tell you, too. It’s really been bothering me that I haven’t told you yet.”

Shiro knew he should let him talk. They’d just finished eating, so he offered for them to move over by his bed, so they could chat. Even though Shiro backed out, he still wanted to hear what Lance wanted to say. “Okay, Lance. Talk to me…” He held his hand.

Now that they were so close, Lance focused on his eyes. “Hey, you were crying…”

“That was a while ago,” he lied, brushing it off as he smiled. He tried to divert his focus by taking one of his hands and bringing it up to his lips.

He blushed before continuing what he had to say. “I wasn’t very honest with you when we started dating, and I’m sorry for that. Really… But I knew I had to tell you. I was just afraid that what I’m about to say would make you see me differently. But that’s a stupid thought, isn’t it?”

“It’s a valid thought,” he offered gently. “I’m sure everyone feels that way every once in a while, when they’re in a relationship with someone they truly care about.”

Lance looked visibly more relaxed. “Yeah. You’re right. So… ready for this bombshell?”

“Bombshell?” he teased with a grin, giving him a kiss. “Are you from the CIA?”

“That’s so much cooler than what I’m about to say.” Lance bit his lip and held his hands. “Shiro, I’m trans.”

_What._

He looked him up and down, so surprised that he let go of his hands. His mind was racing. Lance was trans, too? Was this really happening? He let loose a breath he didn’t realize he was holding, and he noticed that Lance looked nervous.

“Trans?” Shiro echoed. “As in… transgender?”

“…Is there any other kind?” Lance frowned. “Yes, Shiro. I already know what you’re thinking, and I’m still a guy. Just… a trans guy.”

Shiro suddenly laughed on impulse. He gasped and covered his mouth. All this time, he’d been so scared… He had nothing to worry about! He really _did_ have the most perfect boyfriend, one that truly would understand him inside and out! It was in that moment that he immediately fell in love, but he translated his epiphany into a juxtaposed representation of his excitement.

“Are you serious?” he laughed, too shocked to form a proper response. “Oh my god.”

“You know what?” Lance suddenly shot up, grabbing his wallet. “Why did I even bother? If you’re not going to take this seriously, I’m leaving.”

“Wait, what?” Shiro gasped and hurried to follow him. Lance was already storming off to the door. “Whoa, w-wait a minute! I’m sorry, let me explain!”

“What’s there to explain?!” he scoffed. “I won’t be subjected to this humiliation, you jerk!”

“Lance!” He just desperately tried to get his attention for one minute. “Lance, I’m trans!” He paled and realized the door was wide open.

“What, you think this is some kind of joke?” Lance had none of it. “Have a nice life.”

“No Lance, it’s true! Please, I’m sorry—”

Shiro hurried down the hall after him. He was taking a serious risk. No one else knew but his roommate, but here he was, coming out to Lance in the middle of the hallway where everyone can hear him. Right now, he didn’t care. He loved Lance so much and wanted him to stay. What if this was a sign that despite Lance being trans too, he’d wanted to be with a cis guy? That was the worst and most self-deprecating thought that he always had looming in the back of his head.

By the grace of some divine force, Lance finally turned back, giving Shiro a good, long look.

“Please, come back inside,” he begged. “I’m sorry I laughed. I was just… I was so excited. I’d been too afraid to tell you, and sometimes my dysphoria’s so bad that I decide not to say anything when the opportunity comes up. I ended up not wanting to come out tonight either, because I got misgendered before you got here. But you said it first, and I’m just so, s-so relieved.”

Lance moved closer. Shiro relaxed when realizing that his boyfriend believed him now. He frowned and reached to hold his hand. The look on his face was full of nothing but fondness and understanding. “You were misgendered today?”

He couldn’t hold it all in anymore as he nodded, quickly moving to wipe his eyes. Lance hurried and held his hand to take him back into the dorm. Shiro held him tightly once the door was shut, shuddering out a deep sigh as he relaxed.

“I’m so sorry,” he whispered. “Thank you for telling me, Lance.”

“I’m sorry, too.” When Shiro looked down, he saw he was smiling, and they shared a gentle kiss.

“Today was a good day,” Lance assured him gently. “For both of us… You did great today.”

Shiro smiled shakily while kissing him again. “Wanna celebrate a good day?”

Lance turned beet red. “Oh my god, Shiro!” He laughed and hid his face in his shoulder. “Our eyes are all puffy from crying.”

“Yep,” he chuckled and leaned his head down to kiss his neck. “Very.”

Lance’s lips parted on a pleasured gasp, his neck craning back to give Shiro more access. “I’m all sniffly.”

“Mhm…” He purred, teeth gently grazing over a sensitive patch of skin.

He grinned and took very little time contemplating his options. Lance moved back to go on Shiro’s bed, drying his eyes more and settling on his back.

Shiro hovered above him to give him another kiss. He sat on his heels to pull his shirt off, looking down to see Lance staring at his torso in awe. He reached up, delicate hands brushing over the scars from his surgery. They mirrored each other’s smiles, bodies flush together.

“You look terrific,” Lance said breathlessly, briefly looking down at his own body. “I haven’t had my surgery yet.”

“That’s okay,” he crooned. “That doesn’t make you any less of a man.”

“Yeah,” He smiled, pulling his own shirt off. Shortly after—Shiro presumed that he was giving himself a pep talk—he shyly removed his binder as well.

Shiro noticed the hesitation in his eyes, but he quickly let that feeling dissipate as he leaned down to kiss his sternum. “This okay?” he murmured as one hand touched his chest. He waited for an eager nod before leaving kisses on perked flesh.

Shiro could feel Lance trembling underneath him, and he kept looking up at his face to make sure he still liked what he was doing. He especially liked the way Lance jolted when he took one of his nipples in his mouth, and he felt his hand pushing his head further into his skin. The moan that came straight from his chest made his blood rush to between his legs.

“Shiro…” Lance whined above him, tightly clinging to his hair. “More.”

He grinned against his skin while moving further down, his lips brushing along every inch of skin in his path. The coarse hair under his belly button tickled his chin, then his nose as he continued to move. He paid close attention to the sounds Lance was making, judging what he liked and didn’t. He was too ticklish on his belly, but along the happy trail and above the pelvic bone was okay. Lance also loved when he grabbed his thighs and dug his fingers into his skin to pull him closer.

Lance’s hands rushed down to stop his, and Shiro was left stunned as he watched the other undress. He was blushing from head to toe, boxers clinging to his thighs while he tried tugging them off as well. Shiro scrabbled to touch his exposed skin. He was _gorgeous._

“Lance…” he crooned, hands on his inner thighs. He used the position as leverage to keep Lance’s legs open, encouraging him through his shyness. His dick stood out, lower half shivering from Shiro’s rushed breaths. “Still okay?”

He quickly nodded. “You can use your mouth… and fingers.”

Shiro was more than willing to oblige. He put his hand on him, fingers rubbing against his cock, and Lance’s moan was music to his ears. As much as he’d love to draw it all out and watch Lance writhe underneath him until he was begging, he’d been waiting so long to sleep with him that he just wanted to know what it was like to get him off.

He closes his lips around his cock, sucking on it with earnest. Lance’s hips jolted, bumping against his chin, but Shiro didn’t care about the response in the slightest. He just hummed around him, sending vibrations coursing through every nerve in his body.

“O-oh fuck!” Lance whined, hand quickly coming down to his head again. Shiro was surprised by Lance’s borderline feral nature when aroused, and he found that it was difficult to move even just a centimeter away from his cock. He knew he had to give him more, to satiate the beast. His free hand easily moved against his hot flesh, a finger pushing inside him.

While Lance writhed underneath him in pure bliss, Shiro pumped his finger into him, keeping a pace that gave him everything he wanted but was merciless at the same time. He groaned at realizing how easily Lance took a second finger, and he moved them both in unison. He nearly forgot to keep breathing through his nose, now a little lightheaded while practically burying his face between his legs. He dove in, tongue and lips completely ravishing his sex.

“S-Shiro… Shiro, I—I’m gonna—!”

He let out a deep moan, causing Lance to jolt once more underneath him. His hips pushed up so insistently and erratically that he could’ve sworn his chin was bruised after a while. He could feel how dirty his face had gotten, and his ego was singing when feeling Lance clench tightly around his fingers. He was so _hot,_ and _he_ was the one that was providing him this pleasure.

When Lance came, it was a sight to behold. His mouth hung open wide, breaths coming out fevered and rushed. He noted that his voice cracked as well, and his moans rang out like a song. Shiro eased his fingers out and still lightly teased his softening cock with his tongue, wanting to milk every last bit of his climax out of him.

With a thin layer of sweat on his body, Lance practically glowed. His breathing grew more labored as he tried to pull himself down from his high. He quickly fumbled for Shiro’s shoulders, pulling him up with all his strength to face him so he could give him a deep, heart stopping kiss. Lance licked into his mouth while their lips melded together, and Shiro kept his love’s legs wrapped around his waist.

“Oh wow,” Lance breathed after he finally pulled away, a crazed smile on his face. “Let’s do that again!”

“You can pop a boner that quick?” Shiro teased, quickly pulling his boxers down. “I believe I haven’t had _my_ turn yet.”

He watched Lance shift his gaze down to between his legs. He heard his loud gulp, and Shiro’s confidence helplessly spiked. “Oh shit.”

He grinned and shifted up to his knees again. “Like what you see?”

“Absolutely,” Lance gasped, pulling him closer by the hips. “I want that inside me.”

“Yeah?” His face heated up. He reached over, fumbling for the bottle of lube nearby. “A-and, well… I’m not sure if I’m comfortable with fingers inside me there. I prefer anal.”

“That’s okay,” Lance insisted.

“I’m not opposed to trying it, if I have the desire to. But after tonight, I won’t like that very much.”

He watched his love nod, and Shiro looked confused as Lance shifted to the other side of the bed. He was pushed onto his back, Lance parting his legs and looking him up and down. “I was serious, you know.”

His mouth went dry. “A-about what?” Before he could add something in a teasing tone, his breath hitched as he felt delicate fingers take hold of his dick. He was stroked and rubbed several times, and he kept his gaze on Lance’s face, watching him lick his lips.

“This…” he started gently and lifted one of Shiro’s legs up over his shoulder. Lance slotted himself between them, grabbing the lube. “I want you inside me.”

“F-fuck…” Was this really happening? He had sex only a handful of times after coming out, and no one ever wanted to try and take his dick inside him. They were all too freaked out to try that, saying that it was awkward or too small. The latter hurt much more than the former. “You’re sure about that?” He couldn’t help but doubt him or think that Lance was humoring him. “I have a packer we can use instead…”

“Of course, I’m serious.” He leaned down and gave him a kiss. He poured lube onto his fingers, a relatively generous amount, and he moved his hand down to between his legs. He slicked his cock up, each stroke of his fingers sending jolts up and down Shiro’s body. “I’d never lie to you. How badly have you wanted this?”

“My whole life.” He blushed at realizing how quickly he blurted that out loud. He shrugged his shoulders right after, clearing his throat. He had to take several deep breaths, psyching himself up for this experience.

“Well then, you can tell your younger self that his biggest dream is about to become a reality.”

“N-not that young,” he gasped, tapering off into laughter.

Lance pressed down against his pelvis, teasing by grinding his hips right above his sex. “You know exactly what I mean.”

“L-Lance…” Shiro whined softly, hips pushing up. “Please.”

He held his breath when Lance took hold of his cock again. He pushed it upright, and the next thing Shiro felt was a velvety heat completely engulfing him. The sensation worried him for a moment, for he was a little unprepared, and he gripped at the bedsheets underneath him. He watched Lance’s face, and all he could read was bliss and building pleasure. He had this small grin on his lips, breathing labored from excitement.

“Fuck, Shiro… You feel so good,” he hummed, grinding his hips once more. He was _riding_ him.

“Mmf!” He bit down hard on his lip as he kept his hips still. He felt the friction of Lance’s dick against his pelvis, and that was enough to make Lance quiver and moan. Shiro quickly reached down to aid him, rubbing him off in smooth, quick circles.

Shiro felt his hips smack against his own, cock throbbing inside of Lance with each grind and stutter of his hips. His mouth fell open, and he could stop himself from grinding up into him as well. His arousal spiked because of the rhythm, both of them letting out startled gasps and moans in unison.

Shiro was almost embarrassed over how close he was. After fantasizing about this for so long, his imagination paled in comparison to the real thing. He was caught off guard and completely unprepared, desperate to hold on for leverage long enough to not blow his load so quickly. “Lance… f-fuck!”

“You close, baby?” Lance was panting hard, and Shiro didn’t think that he was flexible enough for Lance to keep his one thigh spread out for more skin-on-skin contact. “I want you to come in me.”

“I-I’m not gonna last,” he whimpered out, one hand gripping his hip tightly. He used all his weight and stamina to rut inside of Lance, fucking up into him. Shiro heard his sudden moans, growing louder with each wet smack of their hips. He felt Lance clamping down on his dick as well, and he let out a winded cry. “I’m gonna come!”

“S-Shiro, you can. You deserve it, baby, come on.”

Whatever little restraint he had in keeping his orgasm back snapped, and his mind completely blanked out. It was punched out of him, Shiro crying once more from the sheer force of it. He faintly heard Lance’s moans as well, and the only sense he had was to keep moving his hand to stroke Lance’s cock. He felt him shudder above him, and Shiro realized that he was coming once more.

This was the best sex he ever had.

He didn’t know how long he was out for. The next thing he felt was Lance’s body completely wrapping around him in a full-body hug. His arms felt like jelly as he tried to reciprocate and hold him. Lance’s head rested on his chest, and Shiro craned his neck down to see his mussed hair and this blissed out expression on his face. When Shiro leaned down to kiss him, he could feel his smile against his lips.

“Thank you,” he murmured. “I-I never would’ve thought…”

“No need to thank me.” Lance nuzzled his face into his collar. “That was amazing. I love you, Shiro.”

“I love you too,” he hummed and closed his eyes. He was already feeling tired, going to rest now after a perfect end to a rocky but overall perfect day. He didn’t know why it took him so long to come out to Lance. He should’ve done it _ages_ ago. Other than that, he had absolutely no regrets. As he felt Lance’s breathing slow and they both were slipping into slumber, he was no absolutely sure about just one thing:

He couldn’t wait to do this again.

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on [twitter](http://twitter.com/cryptic_gabriel) maybe.


End file.
